Wasting an Early Sunday

Prime time for my favorite infomercials. Shark Vacuums sucking up the filth of the world. Copper Cookware shaming the patriarchs of non stick miracles. A magic ladder that can take so many helpful forms yet goes by the humble name of "The Little Giant". A Mini Max charger that shames the power of the Hoover Dam. A plethora of exercise machines that can mold and shape my body without sweating but have no effect on Chuck Norris's lack of acting skills. Salves that can prevent teenagers from suffering nuclear acne explosions. Treatments that can make me look 10 years younger but do absolutely nothing to restore my mobility or driving abilities. After observing these I am appalled that no one has developed an award similar to the Emmy's or Academy Awards to recognize the exceptional talents of the shills that ooh and ahh in total disbelief as the product barkers perform miracles before their eyes. I think we could call them the "Toadies" Got to go, got a lot of on line ordering to do.